Can someone say they love someone on Saturday and really wake up on Tuesday and realise they do not love the same person? Is it fear which makes us erase all love or is it because they truly never loved in the first place?
Maybe in a case where beloved person was just acting to be someone else on Saturday, but he/she took off the mask on Tuesday. In that case, you love who you thought that person was, not who he/she really is.
Women are really bad at judging the love of men. They always elevate any hint of love that may be there, but that love can just be temporary lust from the male's perspective. They are unwilling to come to the realization that men just don't view real love in the same way that women do. Men can be in love for an hour, a day, a week, or ten years. We have degrees of love, whereas with women it is usually "all in or nothing." Women set themselves up for a lot of disappointment. Men? Not so much.
As actual and real science has shown, both men and women are initially attracted to visual cues. Men are just more conscious of this fact. The reason this is probably has to do with the fact that men's attention is mostly focused along the lines of the audio-visual spectrum. Women, however, divide their attention along the lines of a much more varied spectrum--audio, visual, tactile, smell (women have powerful noses), and intuition.
Interest in personality is a secondary attraction in both sexes. So in the beginning, women are in fact just as "shallow" as men. They are just less likely to admit it, or even think about it, for that matter. However, both sexes tend to be subconsciously attracted to people who are within their degree of attractiveness. So it is not like we are all going for only visually "hot" people in terms of modern mating and social rituals.
Because the two hemispheres of the female brain (right-intuitive, left-reasoning) are more tightly linked than the male brain, women tend to invest a lot of meaning in emotional encounters with people they are attracted to. Men are somewhat stunted in this regard. For men, a greater degree of association with trust and familiarity is required to form these kinds of bonds. This is why often men are just stuck in the lusting mode. They are not quick to trust right off the bat. For a man, investing a lot of meaning in emotional encounters is a risky business. Love becomes a temporary or probational affair.
And I don't want to sound like a prude, but this is why it's always wise for women to hold back the sex initially in any relationship where the intention of the male is not clear. Because you could be saying I love you, and he will be thinking, I love you too "right now." If it is more than just a casual affair for the woman, she may be investing a lot more meaning in the relationship than he is.
These are all good thoughts, and always come up with the same thing; we will just never know what is going on through someones head when they are in love, pretending to be in love, or lying about love.
