I believe healing comes from having pain acknowledged as suffering and allowing oneself to be angry about it. Refuse to see a positive in suffering and face it fully as a negative, acknowledge it as a negative and permit yourself negative emotions about it, permit yourself to hate someone for placing it upon you, and retain that hatred of them for life. Only then you are self-empowered and free to move on. You have asserted to yourself your self-worth and permitted yourself to feel the correct level of offense. Then it can be let go of. The anger/hate/fury approach is especially effective in trauma.
Hatred and anger are very positive emotions as long as they don't cause the self-distress. They can provide the opposite and are healthy after trauma imposed by another I believe. But people should manage such things in the way that gives them back their quality of life. Suffering helps build your strength mentally and spiritually and also you receive wisdom cause you learn to appreciate a lot after the suffering even if you may not deserve it. We don't know, but afterwards there's something gained. It may not make sense, for reasons we probably don't understand yet.
